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I can why you feel violated, but not necessarily a reason to break up with him.
Perhaps just a discussion about boundaries is necessary. If he's been trustworthy before with your money jar, and he takes only the cheap phone chat lines you agreed on this time, then I'd probably just have a firm discussion with him about this and what he says. If he's aware of your money jar, then you must have some ificant level of trust between each other already.
Do you allow him to come and go from your house at other times without your prior approval? Do you two freely borrow other things from each other in the same way?
If you think about the money as an "-" instead online chate what it is, it help you to put this violation of your privacy into perspective. On another note, if it were me, I'd reconsider how valuable it is to have a relationship with someone who can't manage his bills, to the point that it throws him into panic mode.
Just an inconvenience. A responsible person would have either paid the bills on time, or recognized that they should expect to live without those utilities for a period of time, and dealt with it. Not fly into a panic. It's the irresponsibility and panic response that waves the red for me not going into your house to retrieve money you'd already agreed to, with keys which you willingly gave to him, and when he'd already been into your house on prior occasions without your express permission.
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I promise. I was 15, pissed at my camping friends, walking back to a small town in Mexico, saw a light, knocked on door, was met with, 18 or so, we talked, he lady want adult date invited me to stay the night, walked me to the small storage room where there was a cot, told me free new coconut creek chat line numbers maid might visit me in the early morning, got me thinking and hard-on started.
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Evne to this day, some sixty years later, I still use this memory to expedite orgasms when with my wife, or going it solo.
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As though my options are dwindling and, more importantly, my chances of "spending my life" with someone are slipping away.
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